deadly mist.

great. just when things are starting to open up, more things pop out. there seems to be something covering this darkness however, and somehow i feel i'm the one who's behind it all.

in the end, all our inhibitions are by ourselves, isn't it? i would want to lie to myself and say that everything is external, and i can't do anything about it, but is that true? i highly doubt that.

let me sort it out. i need a planner desperately. and now i realise how important an iphone can be at times like this.

maybe our feelings are trapped in a box where we can't open. a lock of locks. and many whatnots.

i need to believe in myself once again.

concurrent.

i'm thinking what it means to have "love" at this point of time. people have questioned the notion of this simple word, and the definitions are always varied.

well. i really don't know. just on the line yesterday, i've heard about physical love, emotional love, and whatnots. it's really too hard for a simpleton like me to define such a complex emotion.

one that has allowed me to fall flat deep into it, fall flat on the floor, and at the same time, rise up like never before.

well, i'm already shuddering at that thought.

and maybe at that aspect i'm already moving on from it.

or am i just being stuck in the moment, believing that i can step out of your grasp, and wandering out aimlessly for a soul to take me in?

i really don't know. but well, i've given up trying to think.

i shall just feel instead.

i'm moving on in life, are you?

apprehensive.

worried i am. scared i am.

but i guess i'll be fine.

i wonder why.